As a Jersey City-New Jersey Divorce lawyer, I see a lot. I hope this blog helps you in deciding who to hire for your divorce in New Jersey.
Writing the question is easier than saying it,”End your marriage” For the marriages that are real, that were made in good faith, that ended or are ending for one reason or most likely many, the time will come that you have to choose which kind of divorce lawyer do you want for your divorce case in New Jersey? You may think it is simple, you may view lawyers as a simple commodity and if you do, good for you and good luck. If you are a realist you know that the divorce lawyer you choose is very important now and in the future. If there is no need to speak in the future, hiring a New Jersey divorce attorney that will burn the house down and leave no remains may be fine with you. If you have a family with children and need to live another day and have some sort of relationship with your spouse going forward, the lawyer who wants to burn down Rome may not be the right lawyer for you. The lawyer may think its great when he or she walks away with all of your assets but if you have kids you know what it means to have to work together and to find a way to make it as civil as possible for your kids and the other parent. In fact, it is critical. The way our children view how we treat others especially a man or woman, a father or mother, shapes them forever. So put your ego aside and really think this through. It’s not all about money, in fact if there are children, its about them and parenting the best we can.  The following tips are meant to help you in selecting your divorce or family law attorney in New Jersey:

  1. How mad are you right now? Will you be able to calm down? Will hurting your spouse make you happy? Will it take away your pain?
  2. What does life after divorce look like? Will you be able to be civil or will the divorce war create such a bloodbath that nothing will survive or be fixed in the future?
  3. If you destroy your spouse emotionally and/or financially, how will that help your children?
  4. Do you believe in forgiveness or mercy?
  5. Do you want your lawyer to leave the case with more money than you and your spouse?
  6. What would you do or how would you explain to your kids that your pushed their parent so far away that he is no longer around for fear of fake criminal complaints? fake or overstated domestic abuse claims? What do you say?

These questions can help guide you in your decision of choosing a divorce or family law attorney in New Jersey.  The party that starts the battle, sets the tone. If you decide to start the battle with nuclear weapons, be prepared for those weapons to be used on you and your loved ones. It is always best to start a divorce in a civil/amicable fashion when possible. This permits feelings and tensions to ease so the parties can focus on the key areas of their lives. This will take time but it is better than trampling over someone you have children with and married. That person needs to be strong for your kids as you do. So in the end, be careful which attorney you choose for your family law case as what is left behind may be so damaged that no amount of alimony or money can fix. If you have a divorce case in Hudson County-New Jersey contact my family law team on 201-706-7910 to setup a confidential meeting in our Jersey City location.

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